We moved into our new house on Thursday and I leave Friday night to go to the mountains on a required Junior League retreat.  As I close the door, both kids are whining, MJ still can’t figure out the new microwave and there are boxes filled with God knows what all over the house-Oh, and the washer is broken…super.  I pledge to give MJ all the hot lovin’ he could ever want and drive away. 

All is well on the drive up to Boone until I have to start reading the directions.  It’s dark.  There are twists and turns and curves up the mountain and no lights anywhere.  I end up on a dirt road and I pull over and promptly make sure the doors are locked.  The first thing I do is cuss a blue streak damning everyone from the toothless mountain man who wrote the directions to my mother in law (I always find a way to blame her for everything-sort of like 6 degrees of Kevin Bacon.)  Anyway, I’m panicked thinking this is where I will surely die.  I keep hearing “Dueling Banjos” playing in my head and every once in a while, I look over at my headlights shining on the brush and trees and think to myself,”This is where the dead bodies get buried.”

Week 3 was about equanimity-not giving a typical knee jerk reaction, but recognizing where we are and accepting it without a complete freak-out.  This was lesson in action.  I remember to breathe and stop.  “OK, I’m lost, but I’m not gonna die here.  I’m safe, I need to go slowly and figure out which general direction I should go.”  I find the lights of the valley of Blowing Rock below me and head toward it.  Eventually, I called my friend for help (I hate doing that) and found my way.  All during the equanimity focus, I avoided it.  I beat myself up because I barely got to class or practiced at home.  I was just trying to hold my head above water, but getting lost pushed the equanimity lesson right into my face.

The next morning, I woke up early and went out to see the sun rise.  Pinks, greys, blue, white swirled together above the mountains in the distance.  When the wind blew, the trees swayed and rustled in unison.  I remembered the first question Baron asked at the end of the chapter:  How much do I believe the winds of Grace support me, and how does this play out in my everyday life?  Well, I don’t know really what the “winds of Grace” are, but I believe in the grace of God and I’ve felt it even if I didn’t want it or knew it at the time, it’s always been there showing me the way.       


~ Sheri Joseph