Where are you?

Oh, Facebook. Whatever did we do with our hours before we began to dawdle them away on your existence? If you currently have a Facebook account you surely understand, and you probably fall into one of several categories: the “light users,” who are not on that often and have one profile pic and some wall posts. There are the “social users,” who have a few pics and a reasonable amount of friends, and log-on periodically to make plans or chat. There are the “mad taggers,” the camera-toting peeps who post pics faster than you can say cheese, and of course, the “serial status-updaters” (i.e., 5:45 p.m.: Monica is getting ready to eat Mexican! 6:45 p.m. Monica is eating the best Mexican EVER!! 7:45 p.m. Monica has IBS. ?).

Sure, Facebooking can be fun, but let’s explore its ups and downs. A positive experience may go something like this: an old buddy finds you and “adds you as a friend.” You accept the request and visit her profile, maybe write something on her wall. “So good to hear from you! You and the kids look fab! You’re in VA now? I’m in NC! Let’s catch up!” Later that day she writes you a similar message and “tags” you in some great photos of good times from college. She links you up with three of your favorite people with whom you’ve lost contact, and you are now planning a much needed “girls’ reunion weekend.” In the midst of this, your favorite cousin is messaging you, filling you in on the fam back home. Excellent!

Here’s where it gets hairy: upon logging in, you are taken to the “Newsfeed.” You learn that Mary just ate a pound of mac ‘n’ cheese and can’t move, Roger fractured his arm playing Wii Bowling, you have 46 requests to take the “Which Desperate Housewives Character Are You?” quiz, 34 pending requests to “join my cause,” and discover that 24 of your friends are fans of the “I f*cking hate mosquitos” club. OMG, TMI! I wonder why we all have A.D.D.? You move on to your homepage, only to be smacked in the face with five photos you’ve been “tagged” in from that glorious night where you were not only hammered, but somehow managed to form a bright red zit in the center of your forehead that apparently grew larger with every shot you slugged. Why are your eyes half closed? And what the hell are you pointing and laughing at that no one else around you seems to notice? Where…? Oh my God, tequila night. It’s all coming back now. Un-tag! Un-tag! Let’s hope that you’ve gotten rid of these for good, and that they don’t wind up on some Japanese billboard ad for Valtrex. (Note: An innocent U.S. family’s photo really did wind up on a foreign billboard, and I recently also read that a man received an advertisement for “Hot Young Singles!” accompanied by a stolen pic of his wife.)

If you are going to keep Facebooking, or if you have just crawled out from under your rock and are thinking of starting now, then take the following into consideration:
(1.) Be careful of the pics that you post. Any questions, see above.
(2.) Employers search Facebook. I personally know of one who did not hire that perfect candidate she interviewed after seeing her very racy profile pic. Unfair? Maybe. Does it happen? Definitely.
(3.) Think before you update your status. While posting “VEGAS FOR 5 DAYS!!!” will make you look cool to some, to others you actually just posted “MY APARTMENT WILL BE VACANT FOR 5 DAYS–COME GET MY NEW FLATSCREEN I POSTED ABOUR LAST WEEK!!” Now who’s LMFAO?

Overall, it’s interesting.  We have no time for anything, yet take quizzes to discover our chocolate personality. We have eighty ways of communicating, yet we lack communication. We don’t like tabs being kept on us, yet we will openly illustrate everywhere we go, and freely offer up personal info via “25 things about me.” While Facebooking can be a guilty pleasure we can certainly all indulge, start to think about what else we could be doing with our time. Plant a tree. Save a lonely animal from a shelter. Help someone in need. Just don’t forget to update your status so we know where you went.

~ Alessandra Salvatore

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